Stepping Into A New Life

Okay, I thought I’d go back to the beginning. Way back…okay, not that far back, only in reality about fourteen months, although aspects of this started farther back than that, but fourteen months is about where everything started heating right up. And it all started with a vision…

Prior to the vision in the last week of July 2006 things had been tough, really tough. Xavier had been born at the start of February and life just went thoroughly pearshaped with his arrival. Aside from the normal stuff – lack of sleep, hormones all over the place, fighting older siblings, screaming baby etc – Brydon just went off the deep end with the arrival of his littlest brother. Part of the problem, I believe was that he had wanted a sister not another brother. But, I think that was only a small part. I was an emotional wreck and oftentimes the house was tense, and there were many, many times when I just wasn’t coping and I became a screaming, sobbing, ranting mess. I wanted to leave, to walk out the front door and never come back. The thought of leaving or causing emotional pain was in my head a lot and I did walk out the front door a few times and scared the boys and Tim, and for that I am very, very sorry. I know now that those thoughts were not my own and that I was under spiritual attack and I “wounded” my family emotionally during those times.

I am so very, very grateful for the journey God has been leading me and Tim and our family on since then because I now know that we can be freed and healed of this time and the wounds it left in all of us thanks to reading the books God directed us to, especially those by John Eldredge (‘Captivating’ with Stasi Eldredge; ‘Waking the Dead’; ‘Wild at Heart’; ‘The Way of the Wild Heart’ and there are plenty of more yet to read) and Neil Anderson (‘The Beginners Guide to Spiritual Warfare’ – with Tim Warner; ‘Spiritual Protection of your Children’ – with Pete & Sue Vander Hook; ‘Victory over the Darkness’; ‘Bondage Breaker’; ‘Walking in the Light’; ‘Freedom in Christ’ and again, there are plenty more to read yet!) So back to the vision…

It is the last Sunday of July and I am at home by myself – technically that’s not correct, Xavy is here too, it’s just he’s asleep – and everyone else has gone to church (before we allowed ourselves to acknowledge that Tim was actually quite sick and that no amount of pushing himself onwards was going to make him better!) I was going to use the time to do ‘housework’ when I realised that now would be a really good time to have some uninterrupted time with God; something that I wasn’t getting all that much of lately! So I did and it was during this time that God gave me a vision. This is my memory of the vision – I know I have it written down, I just need to find my old journal (I’m into my third journal since then!)

I was standing in a dark place, it was me, yet it wasn’t me, I was kinda shiny, glowing, and in my hand I was holding a sword, a really nice sword, a real sword. And it outshone me! It was kinda golden with light radiating from it and it was lighting up the darkness around me. With it’s light I could see that I was trapped. All around me were trees, dark, ugly, menacing trees, the sort you’ll see in Disney’s ‘Snow White’ – they were grasping at me, holding me, long dark tendrils of branches and roots, like vines entwined about me. It was pretty awful. Interestingly enough though, they were only wrapped around my legs and came no higher than my waist. And I was holding the beautiful, light radiating sword; so I raised the sword up and I sliced through the tendrils on one side and then the other. The sword cut through them easily, like a ‘hot knife through butter’ and once they were cut they fell from me dissolving into curls and whisps of smoke and dispersing into the air. And there in front of me was a beautiful forest glade – the sun was shining, the sky was blue, the grass was lush and emerald green, dotted with colourful wildflowers and butterflies and birds singing. I’m not sure if there was a voice, or I just knew, but I had to step out; step out of the dark forest and into the beautiful glade and that as I did I was stepping into a new life.

Afterwards I just danced and spun around the house singing, “I’m free, I’m free, I’m free!” and claiming the scripture ‘I am a new creation, the old has gone, the new has come!’ (2 Corinthians 5:17) and I felt so free and so alive and it was so totally awesome. To reinforce it I wrote it down and I also acted it out (I felt a little silly at the time, I mean I was embarrassed – I was embarrassed and there was no-one else around, it was just me and God!) and I claimed this new life not just for myself, but for Tim and our family. Needless to say, when he got home from church I told him all about it! Not long after that Tim did his thing to step into the new life God had for us, although he did it without the vision or acting it out.

A week after that we had a new car, it was a miracle we could get the finance! And we were on cloud nine, and it was during this time that I had two other visions. I had been praying for a house and every time I did I would ‘see’ a house in my mind, not in great detail, but enough to know that it is on the side of cliff or mountain somewhere, nestled in amongst the trees, it is white and it is big. The second vision came as I prayed about our finances – we have struggled in this area for a long time – and I saw money falling from heaven, showering down upon me as I stood there with my hands raised (I think that’s how it went – I saw money falling from heaven that part I am sure of, but the second part may have been me putting myself into the picture to help me visualise it – I don’t remember, when I find my old journal I can check it out).

At this stage none of this has come to pass in the physical world yet! Instead of it now being “everything is rosy and working perfectly and we have a fantastic life and we’re living in our house on the side of a cliff and are rich and wealthy…”, our lives went even more pearshaped as what we know now to be spiritual warfare kicked itself into gear and put us in its sights…

More of that to come in Stepping Into A New Life – The Battle’

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